1. I want to go to my index.html page, and see my website, and have the wordpress on the same page == You can't. Because if you have index.html, this will override index.php of wordpress files. I assume you want to run a normal website and wordpress? If yes, then you can install wordpress in a subfolder, and create a "blog" button in your html file. So whenever people come to your site, they can go to your blog by clicking "blog" button. Otherwise, you can't have static index.html and a wordpress blog in the same page.
If you want to have .html file for wordpress, try plugin called "html on pages". This will make your pages have .html in the end of URL address. To make posts having .html at the end, you need to change permalinks in Admin page. But do note, that some people having permalinks error. so backup first before changing permalink if you have important posts.
2. something like ?=1 == This is because you haven't changed your permalinks settings. If you change permalinks, it will show; yourdomain.com/posttitle or yourdomain.com/posttitle.html (if you add .html in your permalink)
3. I would love to add a members login to help with spam == Careful with people registering to your sites, they can be bots and hacking intentions. Just be careful.
4. i also want to be able to ad videos to the site == This can be done easily by embedding the code (don't forget to switch from "visual" to "html" tab in post box whenever you want to write a post, otherwise the video won't show.
5. to see how many times a topic has been viewed also = this can be achieved by having plugin popular posts.